"Well, I guess we could say we have become increasingly bolder in voicing our protests against the Crown in the last few years."
"A parable is a story that is told to better understand it."
"If people today had moral values and observed the law of absence there would not be this problem."
"He shows us how to resist temptation when he was in the desert and he hadn't eaten for 30 days and 40 nights."
"Well, I started lesson 67, but my pen ran out of ink, so I went on to lesson 68."
"Columbus grew and married a Portuguese woman."
"Queen Elizabeth got Columbus started on his first voyage."
"Rodrigo de Triana spotted land from the Pinto."
"What religious affliction is Bill Clinton?"
"The parable of the sower was when Christ fed 5000 with 7 loaves and 7 fishes."
Monday, January 16, 2006
Funny Quotes I saved from College
"Can you pick up some Tridentine Gum at the store for me?" JB
"If you believe someone who's infallible, the science works much better." BB
"Certitude isn't standing out there by itself without anyone knowing about it."
"There are good bees and there are bad bees, but most bees are what bees ought to be." Mr. B (no kidding)
"I can look at a chair and learn something from it, not accidentally, but the making of it wasn't meant to be an occasion for learning." Mr. B
"A circle is the most perfect figure, but not the most perfect form of argument." Mr. B
"Superman seems to violate the first principle of animal motion." Mr. B
"I can't help it if your imagination has been corrupted by experience." Mr. F
"This d--- Algebra gives you no benefit and takes up all your time." Mrs. G
"The last phrase of the Pange Lingua is like the Odyssey." Mr. F
"That's a wild hideous radical ambiguity." Mrs. G
"Unlike YOUR Algebra, his is sensible." Mrs. G
"That lust for cancellation is in me so strong that I want to get it up there." Mrs. G
"You need the drive to reproduce on a geometric level." Mr. P
"Men are nogood as numbers because you can't break them in half." Mrs. G
"If you never stop increasing the sides, how can you roll it?" SS
"People are dense, buffalos are rare." SS
"If you fell 100 feet without a parachute, you'd get hurt and break all your legs." SS
"Let's see, the pain does something to your nature... and the train does something to your nature." PC
"Descartes was a Mathematician as you can see from all the Math he uses. And that's why he uses a lot of Math in his Philosophy." JJ
"The doctor is to health as the shoemaker is to sore feet." SS
"Homer was blind." SS
"I'm not clear on what you mean by ambiguous." BB
"There are two female authors on the program - Jane Austen and MG - both known for Pride and Prejudice." RF
"If you don't think about eternal things and such, you're really, really ignorant, or 3 years old." JH
"I'm leaving the gods out of this. I'm still wondering about the gods myself." PF
"If that's generally accepted as a base thing..." JF
"Not everybody has passions for horrible deeds like insects." JJ
"How can it be legal? It's not calm and collected." JF
Let's face it - planes don't have weight." TH
"If you follow all of Mrs. G's rules for a Sonata, you could come up with a great tragedy." JJ
"Someone might come along and give you a kick, but they don't do it in their capacity to be desirable." Mr. B
"There's nothing you can see that's not there." Mr. B
"They deny final clause." MF
"Surround a perfect knower with some angry knowers shouting out answers to him and he won't get any more knowledge." Mr. B
"It's my experience that nobody knows what they're talking about except me." Mrs. G
"I'm a bundle. Most definitely." JO
"The question of whether you're a bundle isn't something we have to attack." Mrs. G
"The earth's flat and it doesn't move." BB
"We don't have to make ourselves morons. We can just use the picture." Mrs. G
"I was wondering where you got x from. Did you just will that, or what?" SS
"You could say someone pigs-out on concerts, but that's not using 'pig-out' in the strict sense." Dr. D
Law IV of Motivation
Every student continues in his/her own state of studying and enjoying Lab or of rest, unless he/she is compelled to change by oppressive forces. JVH
"You know we disagree on this." EW
"Well, that's what we're here for." JF
"If you think about it at all, it makes perfect sense. That's all." EW to Mr. H
"That's fine Mr. J, I don't want to discuss your personal fortune right now. I have no fortune." MF
"to be is greater than not to be." JO
"How big is an infinitely small length?" Dr. R
"A dot." JO
"Maybe geometry is about light." SW
"Perfect fools must abound in all sorts of deficiencies." Mr. B
"All girls are evil, either actually or potentially." PC
"All boys are evil, either probably or certainly." Mr. B
"Maybe it comes from physics, and maybe it comes from cooking eels in a stew." Mrs. G
"Descartes is not a charitable math. And he doesn't have a charitable face." Mrs. G
"I hate to waste my engineers on easy ones." Mrs. G
"No mysterious ghosts of departed quantities..." Mrs. G
"On page two... that's the second page, for those of you who don't have page numbers." Mr. P
"Don't let any ideas ruin the free flow of your conversation." Dr. M
"When we delight in something, do we hold it and go into a coma?" TH
"There are less eternal things now than there used to be." Dr. K
"It's both annoying and delightful." Dr. F
"OK. You can have vice if you want to." Mr. P
"He created the world ex nihil. So there's nihil sitting over there." RD
"What is reality? I guess I don't understand." DB
"Jumping on a chair when you see a mouse is not cowardice." BB
"It's prudence." Dr. D
"Maybe we have a different idea of what 'long' is." BC
"What would you say about that graphically? Oh... I'm not asking for obscenities." Dr. F
F&W
The Great Insaturation
Rhetoritician
Nutrify
Hyperabola
Simular Figulars
Equitable Motion
Universally Accelerated Motion
Velosophy
Annus Domino
Shphere
Segundum Rem
Volocity
"If you believe someone who's infallible, the science works much better." BB
"Certitude isn't standing out there by itself without anyone knowing about it."
"There are good bees and there are bad bees, but most bees are what bees ought to be." Mr. B (no kidding)
"I can look at a chair and learn something from it, not accidentally, but the making of it wasn't meant to be an occasion for learning." Mr. B
"A circle is the most perfect figure, but not the most perfect form of argument." Mr. B
"Superman seems to violate the first principle of animal motion." Mr. B
"I can't help it if your imagination has been corrupted by experience." Mr. F
"This d--- Algebra gives you no benefit and takes up all your time." Mrs. G
"The last phrase of the Pange Lingua is like the Odyssey." Mr. F
"That's a wild hideous radical ambiguity." Mrs. G
"Unlike YOUR Algebra, his is sensible." Mrs. G
"That lust for cancellation is in me so strong that I want to get it up there." Mrs. G
"You need the drive to reproduce on a geometric level." Mr. P
"Men are nogood as numbers because you can't break them in half." Mrs. G
"If you never stop increasing the sides, how can you roll it?" SS
"People are dense, buffalos are rare." SS
"If you fell 100 feet without a parachute, you'd get hurt and break all your legs." SS
"Let's see, the pain does something to your nature... and the train does something to your nature." PC
"Descartes was a Mathematician as you can see from all the Math he uses. And that's why he uses a lot of Math in his Philosophy." JJ
"The doctor is to health as the shoemaker is to sore feet." SS
"Homer was blind." SS
"I'm not clear on what you mean by ambiguous." BB
"There are two female authors on the program - Jane Austen and MG - both known for Pride and Prejudice." RF
"If you don't think about eternal things and such, you're really, really ignorant, or 3 years old." JH
"I'm leaving the gods out of this. I'm still wondering about the gods myself." PF
"If that's generally accepted as a base thing..." JF
"Not everybody has passions for horrible deeds like insects." JJ
"How can it be legal? It's not calm and collected." JF
Let's face it - planes don't have weight." TH
"If you follow all of Mrs. G's rules for a Sonata, you could come up with a great tragedy." JJ
"Someone might come along and give you a kick, but they don't do it in their capacity to be desirable." Mr. B
"There's nothing you can see that's not there." Mr. B
"They deny final clause." MF
"Surround a perfect knower with some angry knowers shouting out answers to him and he won't get any more knowledge." Mr. B
"It's my experience that nobody knows what they're talking about except me." Mrs. G
"I'm a bundle. Most definitely." JO
"The question of whether you're a bundle isn't something we have to attack." Mrs. G
"The earth's flat and it doesn't move." BB
"We don't have to make ourselves morons. We can just use the picture." Mrs. G
"I was wondering where you got x from. Did you just will that, or what?" SS
"You could say someone pigs-out on concerts, but that's not using 'pig-out' in the strict sense." Dr. D
Law IV of Motivation
Every student continues in his/her own state of studying and enjoying Lab or of rest, unless he/she is compelled to change by oppressive forces. JVH
"You know we disagree on this." EW
"Well, that's what we're here for." JF
"If you think about it at all, it makes perfect sense. That's all." EW to Mr. H
"That's fine Mr. J, I don't want to discuss your personal fortune right now. I have no fortune." MF
"to be is greater than not to be." JO
"How big is an infinitely small length?" Dr. R
"A dot." JO
"Maybe geometry is about light." SW
"Perfect fools must abound in all sorts of deficiencies." Mr. B
"All girls are evil, either actually or potentially." PC
"All boys are evil, either probably or certainly." Mr. B
"Maybe it comes from physics, and maybe it comes from cooking eels in a stew." Mrs. G
"Descartes is not a charitable math. And he doesn't have a charitable face." Mrs. G
"I hate to waste my engineers on easy ones." Mrs. G
"No mysterious ghosts of departed quantities..." Mrs. G
"On page two... that's the second page, for those of you who don't have page numbers." Mr. P
"Don't let any ideas ruin the free flow of your conversation." Dr. M
"When we delight in something, do we hold it and go into a coma?" TH
"There are less eternal things now than there used to be." Dr. K
"It's both annoying and delightful." Dr. F
"OK. You can have vice if you want to." Mr. P
"He created the world ex nihil. So there's nihil sitting over there." RD
"What is reality? I guess I don't understand." DB
"Jumping on a chair when you see a mouse is not cowardice." BB
"It's prudence." Dr. D
"Maybe we have a different idea of what 'long' is." BC
"What would you say about that graphically? Oh... I'm not asking for obscenities." Dr. F
F&W
The Great Insaturation
Rhetoritician
Nutrify
Hyperabola
Simular Figulars
Equitable Motion
Universally Accelerated Motion
Velosophy
Annus Domino
Shphere
Segundum Rem
Volocity
A few more kid quotes
These are all from my oldest daughter back when she was three years old...
"Mommy, I want to blow up the candle."
"Can I wash my hair with champagne?"
"Can you push me over?" (meaning to the table)
"I don't need beauty sleep, I need cutie sleep."
"Mommy, I want to blow up the candle."
"Can I wash my hair with champagne?"
"Can you push me over?" (meaning to the table)
"I don't need beauty sleep, I need cutie sleep."
Favorite Kiddie Quotes
I posted this on Studeo awhile back...
It also should make clear the origin of the title "Christopher Robin Hood".
When my oldest daughter was three, she came with my husband and I to talk to the manager of an apartment complex we were looking into. The man had some sort of speech impediment, but my daughter obviously thought he had an accent (she was just learning about people moving here from different countries and learning English later in life). She was very quiet during the interview, but on the way to the car she said, "Mommy, I tried to hear what he was saying, but I couldn't hear him because he was speaking in a different country."
When my children were young Abe Lincoln by Ingri and Edgar Parin D'Aulaire was one of their favorite books. My three year old daughter was making sand-castles in the back one day. While they looked like a collection of sand-hills to the untrained eye, she was kind enough to elaborate on their construction. "This sandcastle is like Abraham Lincoln's house," she explained, "because it has bear-skin rugs."
My children have always learned little bits about their faith whispered into their ear during Mass. I point out the Consecration and draw their attention to what the priest is doing, etc. One day I took my 2 1/2 year old daughter out of church to change her diaper. We came back in quietly and stayed in back during the Consecration. When she saw the priest hold up the host during the Elevation, she said - loud enough for everyone in the congregation to hear - "Look Mommy, there's Jesus!"
My husband and I were talking about a business trip to Japan while my four year old daughter listened intently. She got very upset at the idea of his going so far away. I tried to console her by saying that at least he wasn't going to the moon. She responded that at least she could see the moon.
One of my kids thought St. Michael was a "Harkangel" as in "Hark the Herald Angels Sing."
One day I asked my two year old son where he got his belly button from - he said he got it for Christmas.
While I was rearranging the "schoolroom" bookshelf, I explained to my four year old daughter that I had to make room for cards. My two year old son asked me a number of times afterwards to play with the "room-fer cards".
When my two oldest were little, they liked to play a game they called "bride and broom".
While changing my two year old son's diaper, I asked him if he was poopy. He said, "Me is poopy." I said, "No. You say I am poopy." He looked at me funny and said, "Mommy's not poopy!"
My husband and his mom were talking one day about how particular our four year old daughter was about words and that you "couldn't put one over on her." My mother-in-law concluded, "Yeah, she's a sharp cookie." Jacinta, overhearing, replied, "No I'm not!"
Amused by the above reaction, we asked our two year old son if he liked sharp cookies. He said, "No. I like fresh cookies."
John and I were talking to our five year old daughter about how much a liter is when John asked how many liters of blood she thought she had. Jacinta was quiet for a few moments (as we watched in wonder) and finally said 28. When we asked her what she counted to figure that out, she explained that she counted all her fingers, all her toes, both eyes, her forehead, her head and her nose. Next I asked her what a liter was. She replied, "It's someone who tells you where to go."
My toddler was trying to finish off the crust of his Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich in order to earn some sherbet for dessert when he suggested (hopefully) "How about put this on table and put sherbet on plate?"
My three year old son had two pieces of play money. He gave one to me and kept the other one in his hand. As he handed me the one "bill," he said "This is two." I said, "No sweetie, it's just one." He held up the bill in his hand and said, "No, this is one."
My five year old daughter was working on memorizing the Ten Commandments. She had memorized the first five (through "Thou shalt not kill.") perfectly. I had prepared myself to explain the sixth to her - "Thou shalt not commit adultery" in a simplified way for a small child by explaining that husbands and wives get married to each other and stay that way until they die - i.e. that they can't get married to someone else... So we started working on the 6th Commandment. I read it to her and she recited it back. Then I asked her if she knew what it meant. To my surprise she answered "yes." She went on to explain, in a very serious voice, that "You're not supposed to yell at adults."
My three year old son asked for some lined paper without any lines on it.
My five year old daughter was talking to her daddy about ears (she had recently watched a PBS show about music). She eagerly explained that there are even bones in your ear, like the drumstick.
My daughter had often heard stories about St. Lucy's Day, particularly from the "American Girl" stories about Kirsten. We talked about making St. Lucy's Day buns for several years before we finally got things together one year when Jacinta was six or seven. She was very excited about the big day and spent lots of time making a beautiful paper wreath with paper candles. We picked up some saffron at the grocery store and worked busily in the kitchen the night of December 12th. Since I had been a little disorganized about the timing, I had to stay up late finishing the baking but assured her that I would wake her up just before dawn so that she could bring Daddy the buns and some hot apple cider before he got up for work. We even "cheated" on the hot apple cider by picking up some powdered apple cider mix that dissolved into hot water. I finally went sleepily to bed at about midnight having filled a platter with charming pretzel shaped sweet breads with a nice glossy finish. She must have been pretty anxious about catching Daddy while he was still in bed, for we were gently awakened at about three in the morning by a nightgown clad little girl in a paper crown eagerly offering Daddy a St. Lucy's Day bun (with no plate) and a half cup of very lukewarm apple cider.
I don't know if it is habit or the fact that he doesn't hear the rest of us when he is praying along; but my son still recites the St. Michael prayer pronouncing that Satan and all the other evil spirits are "...crawling about the world..." seeking the ruin of souls.
My husband and I brought five of our kids shopping one Saturday. We stopped briefly at Home Depot where I ran in to get a few things. My husband noticed a safety fair in which the local fire department was offering free hot dogs and promptly piled all the kids out for a free lunch. When I was done shopping, I found them happily munching away and walked over to get a hot dog for myself. The firefighters running the grill correctly guessed that I was the mother of "those five kids" and went on and on about how well behaved they were. I went back to the van and reported our conversation to my husband. My ten year old son looked at me funny and said, "All we did was get some hot dogs."
Some of their names for things:
Skinny Pig (Guinea Pig)
Grummage Sales
Karmasan Cheese
Scunscreen
Christopher Robin Hood
McDonald Duck
Sneezer Salad
Crunches (crutches)
dog tunnel (dog kennel)
It also should make clear the origin of the title "Christopher Robin Hood".
When my oldest daughter was three, she came with my husband and I to talk to the manager of an apartment complex we were looking into. The man had some sort of speech impediment, but my daughter obviously thought he had an accent (she was just learning about people moving here from different countries and learning English later in life). She was very quiet during the interview, but on the way to the car she said, "Mommy, I tried to hear what he was saying, but I couldn't hear him because he was speaking in a different country."
When my children were young Abe Lincoln by Ingri and Edgar Parin D'Aulaire was one of their favorite books. My three year old daughter was making sand-castles in the back one day. While they looked like a collection of sand-hills to the untrained eye, she was kind enough to elaborate on their construction. "This sandcastle is like Abraham Lincoln's house," she explained, "because it has bear-skin rugs."
My children have always learned little bits about their faith whispered into their ear during Mass. I point out the Consecration and draw their attention to what the priest is doing, etc. One day I took my 2 1/2 year old daughter out of church to change her diaper. We came back in quietly and stayed in back during the Consecration. When she saw the priest hold up the host during the Elevation, she said - loud enough for everyone in the congregation to hear - "Look Mommy, there's Jesus!"
My husband and I were talking about a business trip to Japan while my four year old daughter listened intently. She got very upset at the idea of his going so far away. I tried to console her by saying that at least he wasn't going to the moon. She responded that at least she could see the moon.
One of my kids thought St. Michael was a "Harkangel" as in "Hark the Herald Angels Sing."
One day I asked my two year old son where he got his belly button from - he said he got it for Christmas.
While I was rearranging the "schoolroom" bookshelf, I explained to my four year old daughter that I had to make room for cards. My two year old son asked me a number of times afterwards to play with the "room-fer cards".
When my two oldest were little, they liked to play a game they called "bride and broom".
While changing my two year old son's diaper, I asked him if he was poopy. He said, "Me is poopy." I said, "No. You say I am poopy." He looked at me funny and said, "Mommy's not poopy!"
My husband and his mom were talking one day about how particular our four year old daughter was about words and that you "couldn't put one over on her." My mother-in-law concluded, "Yeah, she's a sharp cookie." Jacinta, overhearing, replied, "No I'm not!"
Amused by the above reaction, we asked our two year old son if he liked sharp cookies. He said, "No. I like fresh cookies."
John and I were talking to our five year old daughter about how much a liter is when John asked how many liters of blood she thought she had. Jacinta was quiet for a few moments (as we watched in wonder) and finally said 28. When we asked her what she counted to figure that out, she explained that she counted all her fingers, all her toes, both eyes, her forehead, her head and her nose. Next I asked her what a liter was. She replied, "It's someone who tells you where to go."
My toddler was trying to finish off the crust of his Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich in order to earn some sherbet for dessert when he suggested (hopefully) "How about put this on table and put sherbet on plate?"
My three year old son had two pieces of play money. He gave one to me and kept the other one in his hand. As he handed me the one "bill," he said "This is two." I said, "No sweetie, it's just one." He held up the bill in his hand and said, "No, this is one."
My five year old daughter was working on memorizing the Ten Commandments. She had memorized the first five (through "Thou shalt not kill.") perfectly. I had prepared myself to explain the sixth to her - "Thou shalt not commit adultery" in a simplified way for a small child by explaining that husbands and wives get married to each other and stay that way until they die - i.e. that they can't get married to someone else... So we started working on the 6th Commandment. I read it to her and she recited it back. Then I asked her if she knew what it meant. To my surprise she answered "yes." She went on to explain, in a very serious voice, that "You're not supposed to yell at adults."
My three year old son asked for some lined paper without any lines on it.
My five year old daughter was talking to her daddy about ears (she had recently watched a PBS show about music). She eagerly explained that there are even bones in your ear, like the drumstick.
My daughter had often heard stories about St. Lucy's Day, particularly from the "American Girl" stories about Kirsten. We talked about making St. Lucy's Day buns for several years before we finally got things together one year when Jacinta was six or seven. She was very excited about the big day and spent lots of time making a beautiful paper wreath with paper candles. We picked up some saffron at the grocery store and worked busily in the kitchen the night of December 12th. Since I had been a little disorganized about the timing, I had to stay up late finishing the baking but assured her that I would wake her up just before dawn so that she could bring Daddy the buns and some hot apple cider before he got up for work. We even "cheated" on the hot apple cider by picking up some powdered apple cider mix that dissolved into hot water. I finally went sleepily to bed at about midnight having filled a platter with charming pretzel shaped sweet breads with a nice glossy finish. She must have been pretty anxious about catching Daddy while he was still in bed, for we were gently awakened at about three in the morning by a nightgown clad little girl in a paper crown eagerly offering Daddy a St. Lucy's Day bun (with no plate) and a half cup of very lukewarm apple cider.
I don't know if it is habit or the fact that he doesn't hear the rest of us when he is praying along; but my son still recites the St. Michael prayer pronouncing that Satan and all the other evil spirits are "...crawling about the world..." seeking the ruin of souls.
My husband and I brought five of our kids shopping one Saturday. We stopped briefly at Home Depot where I ran in to get a few things. My husband noticed a safety fair in which the local fire department was offering free hot dogs and promptly piled all the kids out for a free lunch. When I was done shopping, I found them happily munching away and walked over to get a hot dog for myself. The firefighters running the grill correctly guessed that I was the mother of "those five kids" and went on and on about how well behaved they were. I went back to the van and reported our conversation to my husband. My ten year old son looked at me funny and said, "All we did was get some hot dogs."
Some of their names for things:
Skinny Pig (Guinea Pig)
Grummage Sales
Karmasan Cheese
Scunscreen
Christopher Robin Hood
McDonald Duck
Sneezer Salad
Crunches (crutches)
dog tunnel (dog kennel)
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